Jake Johnson & Damon Wayans Jr for Maxim September 2014

niallimlegal:

*white person voice* so like are you…what like… cultur—like…what ethnic—like…what type of like—what are…where are you from?

gotitforcheap:

cute girl on the street: hey do you have the time?

me: sure do! 8:15

cute girl on the street: thanks 

me: so what are we?

slayboybunny:

alright now i used to hate pitbull because it seemed like the right thing to do but you know what i never hear him doing fucked up shit. as far as i know he is really just out there living life ,enjoying himself, visiting walmarts, and spreading the cubano party into the hearts of everyone around the world, he is mr. world wide and hes having a blast and i respect and love that pitbull. pitbull if youre reading this thank you and im sorry   

Anonymous: how often do you have sex?

pussysista:

How often is your dad “working late”?

diancie:

I wish Black Widow was sung by Nicki and Rihanna instead of their knockoffs.

"I say girls are beautiful and girls are sexy - they need to be told that. If they don't have anyone to tell them that and mean it, I'm gonna tell them."

Most to Least Likely to Zone out of a Conversation

zodiac—signs:

  1. Pisces
  2. Gemini
  3. Sagittarius
  4. Aquarius
  5. Libra
  6. Aries
  7. Leo
  8. Capricorn
  9. Cancer
  10. Taurus
  11. Virgo
  12. Scorpio

shouldnt:

I AM SO EXCITED TO WEAR SWEATERS AGAIN